Tag Archives: broken

Quickly

Someday you might wonder
What if I had held her
For those moments in the morning
Instead of going going going
Until everything was gone
You’ll notice life is feeling long
Though those moments went so quickly –
But what is time without me?

You might fill your days with should haves
Things you didn’t do but could have
And you might start to feel bad
But what ifs cannot sustain you

Maybe you’ll wonder if I blame you
For time spent so distracted
By things that didn’t matter
You’ll question happy-ever-after
And the life you could’ve had with me
If you’d realized when we had it that
Someday we’d just look back at it and
Time passes so quickly
At least it did when you were with me.

Slipped

If ever there’s a time when you question my love
Just know I put you above
Before you showed me why I shouldn’t
There was a time when I couldn’t
Imagine that I’d love you less
I guess humans are too fickle
For ever after, lasting love
Yes, I put you above
But you found a way to pull me down
And so it turns out
That love is not stable and sturdy
I loved with all until you hurt me
Bent me backwards, cracked my ribs
Then cringed as my love slipped and slid
Away from who I thought you were
You wasted all my love on her.

All

You can have it all
My bones and the way I say your name
The game I knew I’d have to play
All the days you made empty.

You can have it all
Hands searching for a place to put their fingers
Lingering eyes so blue but made red
All the tickings of the clock.

For I’ve found myself lost
Wandering aimlessly painfully wavering
On a line I drew then crossed
I’ve found myself lost
With words stuck between my teeth
A heart that’s off beat and
A pair of cold feet
Aimed in opposite directions.

So you can have it all
My knobby knees and unassuming patience
Please just take it as I don’t think I’ll be back
All my thoughts have gotten tired.

You can have it all
Forgotten rings left on bedside tables
Stable smiles hiding a dizzy mind
All the time I pushed your way.

For I’ve found myself lost
Clumsily stumbling fumbling pointlessly
Over rules I wrote then tossed
I’ve found myself lost
With a knotted back and chapped lips
Sad lonely hips and
A body that ripped —
You tore me apart.

Forever

You came home, said nothing
When I dreamt of love
A cold tongue and hollow eyes
Was never what I had in mind.

But love is short, I see
The great divide between forever
And what it’s come to mean —
Something in between the old college try
And one last desperate act
Once love is gone, it won’t come back
They never seem to tell you that
Forever’s not as long as you imagine it will be.

Which brings me to this question —
Did you imagine I’d be different?
You look at me, say nothing
(That always hurts the most)
I’m left with just the ghost of you
When did things become so different?

Well we give up on always but
Blue eyes will always bleed for you
I guess that’s my forever, I imagined it’d be better
You leave home, say nothing
I hope forever’s not as long as I
Imagine it will be.

Release

If you and I no longer fit in this bed where do we go I knew you once behind all the smoke how could this all be a joke to you there’s a time and a place for our love so it goes If that place is gone then I guess I’ll let go but my open door policy’s officially closed I hope that you know – no one will fill that space for you, that’s up to you, and I fear that you’ll fail though once I did believe in you behind all the smoke and the lines that got blurred and the promises given that you wasted on her if you and I no longer fit in this bed it’s time to relinquish your place in my head though once I was sure opposites could attract I cannot be all the things that you lack, the spine in your back or the heart in your chest, infatuation at most but at worst even less.

I want you to know.

I want you to know
I’m sorry for
The space between your bones I used to fill
And it’s not that I gave up on  you
But the smoke in your room
Took my breath away
More than you ever will.

I want you to know
There was a time
When I believed in you, that you
Were lighter than the darkness you created
That you believed in trust

What I’m trying to say is
When you gave up on waking up before two
I took it rather personally.

I want you to know
That, though diminished,
You will always be
The dust in the corner of my mind,
The afterthought, the words unspoken
But not forgotten.

What I’m trying to say is
I’m moving on
And part of me is sorry
And sad to see you bleed
I hope you find the things you need
But I want you to know
I will never be those things again.